The Perks—and Challenges—of Dating a Much Older Man

The Perks—and Challenges—of Dating a Much Older Man

Anyone who’s been in a critical long-lasting relationship understands your way is not without particular challenges, so when you’re dating a mature man—we’re chatting 10 years or more—things will get also trickier.

I understand this firsthand, as I’m 25 yrs old, and I’ve been dating an adult man nearly fifteen years my senior for pretty much four years. Me be clear that I’ve met several other women in their early- to mid-20s who also prefer to date from a much older pool for various reasons while you figure out the math, let.

And even though cliche dictates that, yes, males are involved with it, there’s been some research that is recent about why more youthful females usually gravitate toward mature guys. Evolutionary psychologists state that relationships such as this frequently happen because while fertility persists only from puberty to menopause in females, it starts at puberty and certainly will expand very long into midlife for many males. Which means there’s an advantage that is strategic females to snag an adult gent—he’s had additional time to amass resources and security than his younger counterparts, which can make him a far more viable partner and daddy.

Now, I’m perhaps not saying they are conscious main reasons why I’m dating a guy a great deal older—there are moments that are several I’ve thought that venturing out with some body nearer to my age could be much easier. We even attempted it whenever my boyfriend and I took a break that is short and I discovered it had been painstakingly hard and much more complicated than my experience dating an adult man.

MORE: 5 of Your embarrassing that is most Dating Issues, Answered

Guess what happens I’m taking about. The texting games (just how long must I wait to back text him? Exactly why isn’t he texting me personally straight straight back? Do I need to perhaps perhaps not end up being the very very first to text? It’s exhausting), driving a car of commitment that plagues many twentysomethings, together with fact that is simple many dudes my age aren’t as emotionally mature when I am.

It could be tough once you along with your older partner can’t share youth commonalities (dude’s never read a Goosebumps guide!? ), nevertheless the advantages can simply outweigh those small things. Having said that, you can find not-so-little items that can too cause friction. Bearing in mind exactly what I’ve discovered from my very own relationship and anecdotes I’ve acquired from feamales in comparable circumstances, I’ve outlined the perks and challenges of dating a mature guy.

Jason Statham and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley: two decades apart. (picture:

The perks

He’s usually financially stable I have expected plenty of questions regarding my boyfriend’s funds (why else would We date someone much older, right? Ugh.). It is maybe maybe maybe not actually anybody’s business, but I am able to inform you that I’ve never dated anybody due to money. Generally speaking, there’s a stigma that the more youthful girl dates an adult guy because he’s more powerful and certainly will really look after her.

And while which may be real for many, a 2010 research because of the University of Dundee in Scotland discovered that as females are more economically separate, their flavor might skew toward older (and better-looking) men. Exactly what does which means that? As a lady becomes well informed inside her own job and funds, she seeks someone who fits that, which frequently just isn’t a guy that is 25-year-old.

To be clear, my boyfriend is not rich, but he’s picked up one habit that is important many years: investing. I must admit it is reassuring to stay a severe relationship with someone who’s significantly financially responsible (read: less impulsive). From what I’ve gathered, a guy in their 20s is much more prone to blow their cash on frivolous things, while males within their 30s and tend to be prone to spend less money for hard times and for experiences, like an intimate getaway (wink, wink).

No more texting games. “He texted me personally an hour or so once I texted him. ” “What should I text him back? ” Problem? I’m able to nevertheless recall the days when I’d utter those terms and basically have actually an panic attack each time my phone buzzed also it had been some guy my age that is own i’d casually seeing. Whenever I first began dating my boyfriend, it tossed me down as he didn’t text me personally, but—wait for it—called me personally instead.

And proceeded to call as he said he’d and responded to communications rapidly. As a whole, dating games are rather boring to a guy who’s most likely had their reasonable share. This alone is just a reason we will not return back in to the pool that is dating dudes personal age.

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